New Kids on the Block — “Summertime” and “Click Click Click” (Check them out here.)
Andrew Leahey: This song is wack.
Matt Collar: This song is very Abercrombie.
Heather Phares: Yes, Matt — made me think of LFO’s “Summertime Girls.”
MC: Totally LFO!
Marisa Brown: When I saw the song title, I was hoping it was going to be a Will Smith cover. I was so disappointed.
AL: I did, too! 1991 all over again.
MB: You know things are bad if you’re hoping for a Will Smith cover.
AL: Instead, we got … like … 1998.
HP: That’s progress for NKOTB, though.
AL: Maurice Starr giving way to Lou Pearlman is progress?
MB: NKOTB + progress = LFO?
HP: That’s the equation, Marisa.
MB: I think there’s a sine wave associated with that somehow.
Stephen Thomas Erlewine: It’s a clear nostalgia ploy, which I can’t quite blame them for doing, but it’s pretty mixed up.
HP: I dunno, I didn’t think it was that bad. It’s not something I want to hear all the time, I just didn’t think it was as crappy as an aging boy band reunion could be.
AL: At least the guys don’t sound as old as they are. They sound youthful. And this a cappella part isn’t too bad, assuming you can ignore that guy chanting “bring it low, bring it back.” Or whatever he’s saying…
STE: It’s not all that good but it’s not all that bad — it’s livelier than Backstreet Boys.
MC: I kind like the dopey flow they have on it though. Gets stuck in my head as I imagine the accompanying dance moves.
STE: I do like that they don’t run from the dopiness — they’re not really trying to sound hip, not trying to ride the JT train, they’re basically getting their old fans — like Diablo Cody — back.
HP: This is something that their old-school fans and their kids can enjoy together. And they’ll get some Radio Disney airplay.
MB: I like their other new song better. “Click Click Click.”
AL: Is it a “Please Don’t Go Girl” or a “Step by Step”?
MB: It’s everything you’d ever want it to be.
STE: All right Marisa, I’m totally in agreement with you on “Click Click Click” — this has a little bit of the chilly “What Goes Around” vibe, but the harmonies warm it up and it’s pretty good…
HP: Yeah, this song is more “grown-up” — I kind of like that “Summertime” isn’t trying to be that mature. The production IS better though.
MB: It’s way better.
STE: I like that they cover both ground — “Summertime” will open the tours, “Click Click Click” will be the hit.
MC: “Let ‘em take a mental shot of this moment.” Is this a concept song about a fashion photographer?
HP: It’s their musical homage to Blow Up.
MC: If that’s true, then Pitchfork will love it!

Lindsay Lohan — “Bossy” (Check it out here.)
MC: “Ho ho, stop touching me!”
HP: Yeah, that’s my problem with the song — this is the LEAST in-control she’s ever sounded. How can she be all that bossy when this person is already touching her? I like the song a lot — especially “I like it how I like it when I like it and that’s just how it is” or whatever — but it’s not a confident-sounding song.
STE: Well, Heather, that explains a lot about her life at this point in time. It’s also the most desperate she’s ever sounded. She’s really gunning for a hit.
MC: I really dig this. LOVE how she sounds like a bratty girl in the chorus.
MB: Not being much of a Lohan connoisseur, I don’t know how to compare this to her other things. But I’ve forgotten it already. Is that normal?
HP: Yes, Marisa.
MC: I think it sounds more club friendly. More like a throwaway disco hit.
STE: I kinda love this song — I think it’s awfully misguided and it doesn’t really work, but I love it for that. It’s kind of like the I Know Who Killed Me of dance songs. She’s actually talking to her twin here.
HP: You overthought it more than I did, Tom.
STE: Lindsay inspires me that way.
AL: I had semi-high hopes for this, though, particularly since I sorta liked that song she did for the Confessions of a Drama Queen soundtrack. But this doesn’t appeal to any sort of guilty-pleasure sensibility. It’s just forgettable.
MC: I disagree. Really gets stuck in my head.
HP: Oh, I dunno, I feel plenty guilty for liking this.
AL: Have you heard “Drama Queen (That Girl)”?
HP: Yes Andrew, I like that song too.
AL: It includes a Lohan rap about self-empowerment! Now THAT instills guilt in the listener.
HP: I even like the song she had on the Herbie: Fully Loaded soundtrack!
AL: Yes, that song rocks. Give me that and Hilary Duff’s “Come Clean,” and I totally turn into a 12-year-old girl.
STE: She does over-sing a bit — articulates everything way too much — but, again, that throws it off enough that I really like that aspect. And I love that it plays into her bratty/bitchy persona — that really works. And that “I like it how I like it” chorus is very funny, catchy.
HP: It is unfortunate, though, that the song is called “Bossy” when Kelis’ infinitely superior song owns that title.
STE: That’s kind of the story of Lindsay’s life — somebody else got there first.

Oasis – “I Wanna Live a Dream,” “They Ain’t Got Nothing on Me” and “Stop the Clocks” (Check them out here.)
STE: As a longtime Oasis fan I have to say I’m quite pleased with these — especially “They Got Nothing on Me.”
MC: These are very earnest, respectable songs for Oasis.
HP: Yeah, I like them a lot too. They need to focus the songs a little more and keep the production almost as simple as it is here.
STE: I agree — a little more color than this, but not overblown.
AL: I really like “I Wanna Live a Dream.” Doesn’t sound heavy-handed, doesn’t sound too coked-out … just sounds good.
MB: Yeah, that’s my favorite, too.
MC: Also, it’s been a long time since any kind of Brit-rock or alt-rock has had a recognizable lead voice and so I welcome back Oasis wholeheartedly.
STE: Well, that’s the interesting thing about the decade-plus of post-Oasis bands — very very few have either a distinctive perspective and almost nobody has a singer like Liam.
AL: Or a singer like Noel! He’s a very underrated vocalist.
HP: I agree Andrew! He has a really nice voice, especially for ballads. He’s the clean tone, Liam is the stompbox.
MB: Yeah, it works really nicely here.
STE: I agree Andrew — Noel slays almost all Noelrockers, he has a real warmth on it. For me there are so few singers trying to do what Liam does — nobody can, so all the post-Oasis bands do bad Noel.
HP: I hope they keep the production raw by their standards and inspire other Brit bands not to drown their music in glossy studio tricks.
STE: They were coming close to that on Don’t Believe the Truth, so I’m hoping they continue on that route.
HP: I really like the dreamy psych bent on these Noel songs. “Stop the Clocks” is nice and introspective like “Champagne Supernova,” but not as ponderous.
MB: It makes me miss the days What’s the Story was on my discman everyday… “Dream” would fit nicely after “Don’t Look Back in Anger.”
HP: Yeah, Marisa, these songs make me nostalgic for when I really LOVED Oasis too.
MC: I vote for the album being called Stop the Clocks.
STE: Too bad they used the title for their hits comp. Classic Noel jumping the gun. Like when he poured out all those great songs on the B-sides of Definitely Maybeand What’s the Story. What I like about these is that Noel — and Liam now too, who is turning into a pretty good writer — really knows how to construct a song, to build to the chorus and bridge.
MC: Yeah, which is what has been kind of missing on their last few albums. Some great songs on those as well, but a bit lost.
STE: I think the last two albums are pretty good — well, Heathen Chemistry is the one that’s really lacking in great Noel songs (that’s where Liam turned into a writer).
AL: I was in a Dublin pub when “Don’t Look Back in Anger” came on the jukebox, and the place went absolutely insane. Scores of drunk, red-faced dudes hoisting their beers and howling along.
HP: That song was made for drunken hoisting.
STE: But Don’t Believe the Truth has some fantastic songs on it and I like the band vibe. Plus “Lyla” is timeless, at least for me.
MC: “Lilo”? Sorry.
STE: Hey, that’d be awesome.
HP: Lindsay deserves better Brit bands than McFly writing songs about her.
STE: Anyway, I like that Oasis is kind of settling into their strengths — they’re never gonna have that growl that they have on Definitely Maybe, but I think they’re building up a hell of a track record.
HP: Yeah, Tom, if the rest of the songs are as good as these demos are, this might be the album that makes me a fan again.
MC: I agree Tom. Might never recapture that aggressive, visceral pop. But I’m excited for this.
MB: Yeah, it looks like it could be a new era for them.
STE: Yeah, me too Matt — makes me feel good to be an Oasis fan.
AL: Me too. Go Oasis.

Coldplay – “Violet Hill” (Check it out here.)
STE: All right, I’m having a typical problem with “Violet Hill” that I have with Coldplay — the atmosphere obscures whatever melody/song there might be. Melody peeks through on repeats, but I’m not sucked into it.
MC: On the positive side, it sounds more classic rock to me. Very Fleetwood Mac which I like.
STE: Classic rock via Fleetwood Mac
AL: At least it’s not another retread of the “Clocks” riff.
AL: The guitarist finally grew a pair and demanded that he be allowed to play something.
STE: At least this isn’t as simpering as “Fix You” — or “Yellow,” for that matter. I like this better than those by a wide wide margin.
HP: Wow, it sounds a little purposeful.
AL: Yeah, they definitely wanted to make something harder.
HP: A little harder. Which should be the name of the album.
MB: I like the build up, I have to say. They should’ve just ended it there instead of getting all weepy at the end.
MC: Reminds of an ’80s song/band I can’t place.
STE: U2, Matt.
AL: U2 would never do this heavy-handed drum thing.
MC: Like Genesis? I envision Spitting Image puppets.
HP: Yeah, it is a little like Genesis!
AL: “Land of Coldfusion”? “Lamb Lies Down on Coldplay”?
STE: What surprises me is that it doesn’t feel like a single to me — it feels like an album rock track, something that would come after a first single that already hooked people in.
MB: Coldplay consider their career one long album, Tom.
STE: That Genesis angle is that very British/European bent in their music — the kind of classy arty stadium-filler that Q falls for.
MC: What/where is Violet Hill?
HP: Next to “Solsbury Hill”?
MC: Does not sound as pleasant as either Solsbury or Blueberry hills.
STE: I had “Lamb” in my head all day yesterday — this must have been it. That and “Counting Out Time” — “erogenous zones I question you.” Goddamn I love Peter Gabriel.
HP: Now that’s the Genesis guy they should be emulating.
STE: Hey, I’m really happy for any Genesis influence.
MB: The guitar line is straight out of PG’s songbook — “I don’t remember, I don’t recall, I have no memory of Coldplay at all.”
STE: Did anybody listen to “Viva la Vida,” which is also up on iTunes?
HP: No, how is it?
STE: It’s a bit more what you might expect, built on strings, but it also feels like it has more of a spine. And like “Violet Hill” it’s a grower. If the album is like this, that will be very good — they need to back away from the mewling, which it seems like they are.
HP: Wow, it’s gonna be so weird if I like Oasis again and Coldplay for the first time.
AL: This song might be the one that makes you like Coldplay?
HP: I mean, I ended up liking “Clocks” because of that Six Feet Under promo they kept playing on HBO, and “The Scientist” because I liked the video. But to actually like one of their songs for its own merit? Hmmmm….
STE: And I liked “Yellow” after Brooke White covered it. I kid.
AL: I liked “Clocks” because of the Bono-cribbing bridge.
MC: I can kind of get with this song being played and having to hear it, but it won’t make me like them or anything.
STE: Arpeggio on “Clocks” always bothered me. To me, “Clocks” always felt like a right-hand piano exercise blown up into an anthem.
AL: Yes, it was a simple riff and that same damn drum pattern that the dude always does (which is also the pattern from U2’s “Beautiful Day”).
STE: So I prefer this — the atmosphere is too heavy at first, but after it lifts, there’s a song there.
MC: Stop the “Clocks”!
AL: I don’t know, I’d rather have them do something like “Clocks” than this. I don’t buy the rhythmic stomp.
HP: That may be why I like it — it’s just so atypical for them.
AL: But I’m not a Coldplay fan in the least, so perhaps I should defer to the potential fans.
HP: I’ll never be a fan, but they do manage to make at least one song every now and then that I don’t mind.
MB: Well, that’s high praise!
AL: Oasis wins the track meet.